NSPCC

I'm not a big fan of children and take great delight in picking up one of my young cousins, around two - four years old, and wonder into the kitcken with them under my arm. Talking loudly to my family about what we are going to have for lunch before trying to stuff the small child into the oven as he/she shreaks their little head off with fear.

Any how, my friend sent me these ....... either he is hinting that I'm doing wrong or he was involved in making them

Skate tricks and crazy slo mo

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofMqVggjrTk

They didn't want you to see this new beer ad yet!

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

SHOW ME THE MONEY!!!!!

After following the advice on Money Saving Expert I decided to ask for all the money Sharkleys Bank has ripped from my clenched fist for going over drawn (normally on the last day of the month milli seconds before my pay cheque goes in). The last time they did this I up sticks and moved bank to www.smile.co.uk
I now have £115 pounds of fun money to spend. I could go out on the lash but I want some thing that will remind me of my victory over "The System".
It's either going to be a new watch, a bow or 115 lotto tickets ........

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

The type of Virgin I like.

Should people have sex before marrage?

No, that's not the type of Virgin I'm on about. I really mean Virgin Wine.

Since joining Smile Bank they have sent me two vouchers for a crate of wine from Branson's own wine celler (well one of his warehouses). I must say if Barclays had done the same I would still be with them.

Smile, ethical banking and crates of booze. What more can a man ask for?

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Since work is in short supply in the office I have been able to catch up on personal admin. I have been able to go through the photo's I took last month when I was in Edinburgh seeing Gilly. I was testing out a new lens I got off Ebay.

I was using a Nikon D50 and a Nikon Nikkor 35-105mm f/3.5-4.5 AiS Zoom lens.

I also picked up a Nikon FM2n SLR which I may or may not sell on for an honest profit.  

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Slow Walkers!

I have found that my tolerance for slow walkers has reduced down to almost zero. I have got used to moving fast with an air of urgency and focus. I have discovered that London is not the place to do this as 90% of the plebs walk at snails pace in a world of their own. They bimble with intent! The effect of this is I end up continually over taking the afore mentioned plebs all the time like a Pontiac GTO constantly lapping a Robin Reliant. After a weekend away I have to fight the urge to yell "MOVE IT!!!!!" when I'm stuck behind the lead footed trog I'm stuck behind.

I'm now off to find out if it is legal to use a cattle prod on these people.

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Where has all my time gone!

Since Feb I have been on the go none stop, if it was not work then it was training, if it was not training then I would be seeing my girlfriend. Any free time in between is taken up with "Oh, can you help a friend of mine with his computer?" favours. Although I get paid for these sorts of things it is becoming more hassle than it's worth. I get a phone call from a friend wanting to know if I can help one of their friends sort out something really simple like advising on Broadband/VoIP/Skype/upgrading. So I agree and expect to be in and out with in an hour. When I turn up at their house they then inform me of the 1001 problems with their steam powered PC and they expect me to fix it with in the allotted hour. This really hacks me off!!!!! Once I have given their SP PC a health check I give them a list of what is wrong and they look at me with a blank expression as I explain to them politely that if the had read the bloody manual then they would not be in the state they are now. Come on, how hard is it to install a free Fire Wall or Anti Virus?

Though I do get my own back when I explain to them that because they do not have any security on their SP PC that any transactions they have carried out on it may well have been compromised ad they should check ALL their bank statements. This has them shitting bricks.

My prices will now be in line with the pros and i hope that puts them off trying to hire me. Or maybe I should be a right git and send them down to PC WORLD. Mwwwahahahahhahahhaha!!!!!

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Meeting the in laws.

After two years dodging and weaving Gilly managed to get me to meet her parents. Not as bad going if you ask me, I wonder if there is a world record? 

While we where in Perth we wondered over to my old  primiary school only discover some one has built houses on the old slaughter house holding pens. I wonder if Flossy the sheep haunts some ones livingroom or kitchen.

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Just like Weird Science I have created, with loving hands, my own Mistress. My bike is almost completed, just need to buy some cable housing for the rear brake and I'm there.

Every time I walk past her, she whispers "take me out", just like a real woman. I'm scared.

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Keys to the Tower.

I will no longer need to wait for my Girlfriend to let down her fair hair for me to climb in order to enter her flat. She gave me keys and strict instruction to make my self at home. This is a stepping stone in our relationship but I will need hide a stash of beef jerky and beer for when I'm home alone.

Read and post comments | Send to a friend

Oh, bugger I've done it again!

I could not find my iPod Shovel the other day, thought I had just left it a jacket pocket or an ant had borrowed it. I did not worry as I knew it would turn up and turn up it did ........ inside the washing machine! It's not as bad as it sounds as I'm an old hand at this, a couple of hours on the radiator and it is good as new and the ear buds are nice and shiney. I think some sort of cord or racoon tail is needed so I can find it ....... or I could just check my pockets before throwing them into the wash.

Read and post comments | Send to a friend